Sweeps Weeks Explained!
(Crock)
Sup, wimps! I've been long considering what the hell I'm gonna do with our lame-ass "Shutupyourmouth Myspace" page. I've arrived at a decision. I'll do nothing with it! There! Short story!
More interesting news has Rollo and I knee deep in the infancy of an idea for a new video. I need to put more effort into it, but it'll come. We're hoping to get many new videos out to you, our beloved and revered viewers, since it is summertime and moving pictures are most certainly in season.
Oh! This is a "Crock & Murph" blog, you say? Well crap. The above doesn't have a lick to do with "Crock & Murph", you say? Double crap. I'll not get away with such inattentiveness or slip one by you, our majestic and glimmering viewers. I'll set to task immediately.
Our latest show was certainly interesting. Murphy gagged somewhere during the second segment (literally, I mean, he was really struggling not to puke --- but he eventually did anyway) because we can't seem to find a guest who will behave. Phillipano Pete seems to be doing pretty well when he hauls himself away from wrestling contracts and whatever else people of his ethnicity do in southwestern Pennsylvania.
Since its officially "Sweeps Weeks" here on Crock & Murph, you can bet you'll get your full dose of characters. That's right. You're going to be force-fed the likes of "Red Scare", "Ronald J. Fairshoe" and "Dumb Donnie" until you're crapping original SUYM ideas. Prepare your pooper.
Sweeps weeks is typically five months long, but due to time constraints we're moving further ahead in the action. That means you'll get 2-3 weeks of solid, 100% pure SUYM thought and conjecture. Will you get unique stories and well-thought-out reporting? Well, you might get unique stories. You certainly won't get anything that has been "well-thought-out".
Some questions have been flying into our mailbox here, and there's too many to answer during this week's edition of the "Lightning Round" so I'm going to unleash them upon you poor folks at this very moment.
Ready?
Go.
Question 1:
Now that Murphy's rehab bill is in excess of $25 million, how do you expect him to "right the ship"?
- Anne 30, Waynesburg
A1:
(This works out well, since this obviously can't be a Lightning Round question) Well, what I've come to expect from Murphy -- rehabilitated or otherwise -- is NOTHING at all. I figure this is the best way to not be disappointed in the end. You can probably expect to be ridiculed at some point. Yeah, that's it. Ridicule. That's what I expect. That and a lot of "WHAT!"
Question 2:
Piss on Crock & Murph. This shit is seriously the worst thing on the internet. Murphy sounds like a chain-smoking asshole. Is Crock admittedly gay, or what is his deal? You both ass suck.
- Tim B. Pittsburgh
A2:
Great grammar!
Welp, that's not all of them, but its certainly enough to keep things interesting. To keep with my inability to stick to "Crock & Murph" topics, I'm also thinking about making some new memoirs this summer. It'll be the first entries since "The Summer of Them Memoirs 2003" - as you can see, long overdue.
-Crock
